When I started doing GaptoothDiva Entertainment, the goal was to support those individuals like me, who had dreams and ambitions that they wanted to pursue regardless of what society thought and believed. I was often told that because of how I looked or what I said, people wouldn’t support me or my ideals. It has been a never ending uphill battle trying to find out whether people are feeling me or if what I’m doing is falling upon deaf ears.

 

I recently learned from several people, some my networking colleagues and some the people we promote on our show on this website, that if you truly believe in what you do and what you have to offer, then acceptance is the last thing you should seek. I’m mature enough to admit that with all the experiences I have had doing this and the multitude of other projects I’m involved in that it’s never too late to learn something from it. I should’ve thought about that from the start but it never crossed my mind.

 

I assumed that with acceptance, you get support. If you have support than things become easier. However, with all the support come many people who want you to continue to meet their needs and demands, otherwise the support disappears. So you are left sacrificing your dreams vs. the dreams of your supporters. It’s all a tangled web of trying to satisfy everyone else and never accomplishing what you set out for yourself from the start, which were your dreams and your ideas.

 

I may not have a group of people who are standing on the sidelines waiting for instructions on how they can help me reach my goals, but at the end of the day I won’t owe anybody either. I may not have a large network of mentors willing to teach me the ins and outs of what I’m trying to do, but then again I will always know I’m seeking information on my own and not being spoon fed someone else’s experiences and challenges.

 

God puts us all in positions for us to learn and grow, and never promised it was going to be easy. I now understand that if it’s a little harder for me, it’s because there it’s a reason for it. I remember passing the same ideas to close of friends of mine, who initially didn’t see it being successful. I did it anyway, and I’m proud to say that I’ve become an example of how some of this should be done, because those same people are now doing it as well. I thank God that I was able to be an inspiration to them and that is what I should be focused on. I should be focused on the people that do gain something from the craziness I do bring to the table by being myself and doing what makes me happy, rather than being someone else and never knowing what happiness is.

 

I had a conversation with someone recently who I respected, and who I believed respected me in return. However when I started to seek progression and discussed moving in a direction that would benefit me and my ambitions, I was faced with a cold shoulder filled with emptiness and told that the work I did for so long was never actually enough. Of course, this contradicted everything I was hearing for so long, otherwise why would someone allow you to bring them down for so long without even a heads up. Often times when you refuse to satisfy the masses, they turn on you. It’s up to you to continue or allow their words, which are usually stemming from hurt and confusion, allow you to fumble and drop the ball. I chose not to hear it, because I know how far I’ve come and I won’t believe that God brought me all this way to allow me to fail based on someone else’s logic.

 

As I continue to pursue my dreams and hopefully inspire you all to do the same, I just want you all to know that it will be me that going to do it. I may not say all the right things, especially all of the time. However, I want you to understand that I am a spiritual human being like most of you, I make mistakes and I don’t know everything. I won’t pretend to be apart of a large entity to gain exposure or to seem more than what I am. I will be myself regardless, and I believe that more people should try to do the same.

 

I hope you all go after whatever it is that makes you happy, but do it without the approval of others. If you believe, you should know that the enemy will use those closest to you to keep you from your destiny; it’s up to us to have faith in our own abilities because they came from our Creator.

And God don’t make any JUNK!!

 

Thank you so much for your support and let’s continue to get it regardless of our haters’ hurtful words.

 

 

Follow me @GaptoothDiva on Twitter

Facebook.com/GaptoothDiva

 

2 Comments

  1. I’esha be encouraged. Most of all be yourself. God does not want carbon copies. I totally understand where you are and it’s lonely when you are headed to the top. My theme song is Mary J. Blige “Work That” it’s about real as life itself. I feel like God let her write it just for me. When destiny calls you can’t be anyone other than yourself even if you try. It will be worth it when you look back. Just learn the lessons. God will bring those in your life that he has called to support your dreams and vision. They are probably not going to be the people you think. Those close to you may not be able to see the whole picture.

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