The plan on Sunday was for me to attend the 5th Annual Date w/ Dad event conducted by Camp Diva (www.campdiva.org); I had my dress laid out and was very ready to go. I knew how extraordinary this event was expected to be and I didn’t want to miss a minute of it.
However, Divine intervention stepped in and decided not only to make the new baby kick my behind a little more than usual, but to also give my 4-year old the idea to jump off the couch and hit his little head on our glass coffee table. As I sat in the E.R, worried about my first-born, I couldn’t help but feel awful at the notion that I might not make it to this highly anticipated event with Camp Diva. I have always been amazed at the work they were doing with young women, and want so desperately to get involved myself and help make even an iota of a difference.
While watching A’veri get those stitches, and how emotional I was getting (blame the pregnancy), even my husband knew that likelihood of me leaving him that day was slim to none. So in slides, Superman Hornes, offering to go in place of me. He had been working with me off and on with GaptoothDiva.com, doing the scheduling for our internet radio show and sometimes attending events with me and taking pictures. I trusted him completely to represent us and catch the dynamic of the event, while I catered to our aspiring stunt-double of a son. He took on the responsibility with no problem.
Apparently, by going to this event it stirred up some feelings and ideas about fatherhood. Being a young man, whose father was absent in his life, he said that he was moved by the amount of men that took pride in raising their daughters. He basked in the idea that only a few days ago, he would have been one of these men, dancing and laughing with his little girl, if only God didn’t see fit to grace us with another boy. He mentioned that even though, he was going to be a father to his two boys, it meant so much to him that he BE THERE, not just financially but emotionally, spiritually, and physically. He wanted to take the mission of Camp Diva and apply it to how he raised his own children. He was touched, and you could see how affected he was when at 2:00 am; he was still talking about the various conversations he had with the different fathers and what he learned.
I was so proud of him. Being a woman whose father was always in the home, but never quite there, I could almost relate to the absent father theory. Although I appreciate my father never taking off and leaving my mother to do it alone, it almost felt like he might as well left us. He paid the bills, but never really tried to know us personally, he was absent emotionally and spiritually. Therefore, when my husband said that he talked to fathers who knew their kids’ friends name, their favorite movies, songs, and colors, I was seriously blown away. Some mothers claim to be too busy to know this kind of information, let alone the fathers. My husband said he wanted to be the father that the kids felt comfortable talking with no matter what, that he didn’t want to appear to just be the “provider”, someone they were lucky to have. Seeing that type of passion in my Husband about the way we plan to raise our children, I knew that the event did what it was intended to do.
He talked about the games, especially the “Would You Do Anything for Your Daughter” game, which had us laughing for a while. He also talked about how happy every little girl there seemed, watching them show off their fathers as if they were brand new dolls straight off the assembly line. Looking through the photos, he lighted up. While he dodged and dodged the idea of having a girl for months, this event made him realize that it wouldn’t have been so scary after all. I can’t help but laugh, because it’s obviously too late, and we are not even going to discuss having another one any time soon (sigh). He said he truly had a great time and suggested that we invite the whole family next year, not because of the father daughter theme, but because this event represented family…. At it’s finest.
I thank my Husband for standing in for me, doing what only a best friend would do. I especially thank Camp Diva for inviting us and being so gracious to him while he was there. Organizations like this are exactly what we need to start paying more attention to. When they affect people from all lifestyles and all backgrounds, when they inspire grown men to be better fathers and grown women to be better mothers, we know we have something special.
Check out Camp Diva and get involved – www.campdiva.org
For more of the Baddest Creative Motivation – www.GaptoothDiva.com
- GaptoothDiva Shares Her Vision Board for 2012 and Beyond (gaptoothdiva.com)
- How to Get Your Music Featured on Blogs and Internet Radio Shows (gaptoothdiva.com)
- Life Lessons You Can Take From A Hair Battle Royal or Local Hair Competition (gaptoothdiva.com)
- Why Dad’s Count! (resetparenting.wordpress.com)
- Cisca: How your unborn daughter could improve your love life (and other stories) (thisisbeaudacious.wordpress.com)
- The War On Women Begins With Girls (ideas.time.com)
- Fathering (marriagemechanic.wordpress.com)
- “52 Things Kids Need From A Dad” by Jay Payleitner (52 Things I Wish I Knew When I Was Raising My Three Sons!) (haroldcameron.wordpress.com)
- Question For Fathers From A Daughter. (drchana.com)
- A father’s role in raising amazing daughters (sentimentsoncommonsense.com)
- The Father I Wish I Was (anotherhallucination.com)