I’m thinking to myself right now after seeing Beyonce’s new pixie haircut (yes, I’m a big fan of hers… kiss my grits), “What is wrong with a little change?” I saw random comments from people, who apparently feel that Mrs. Carter should have kept her luxurious locks long, as this was her signature style. As if Beyonce’, although having never done it before officially, shouldn’t wear short hair. Some shots fired said, she is trying to be like (insert any artist with short hair here) or it doesn’t fit her brand, blah, blah, blah. There are many others who feel that she looks amazing, and just like me, love a little “change the game” from our favorite entertainers. Just because she is Beyonce’, it doesn’t mean she has to stick to any one thing. Her talent is still evident, regardless of what her hair looks like.
I’m so exhausted with people trying to tell you what you are supposed to do and what you are supposed to say, but then on the other hand they are all desperately seeking to be different and separate themselves from everyone else. It is this bipolar and judgmental culture that makes it almost impossible for some people to do anything that is dear to their hearts for fear of criticism. I have been suffering silently for quite some time, myself. However, this issue is much deeper than a big chop and some hair color, it’s about being constantly placed in a box, stereotyped, and categorized.
When you’re a mother, they judge. When you’re a wife, they categorize. When you entertain, they criticize and bully. When you love God, they stereotype, and while all of this is supposedly normal to some people, it’s extremely frustrating to me. The idea is to do what you love, to have fun and create the things that you like, and never have to worry about what people say or do behind your back because we all just chalk those people up as “haters”, right? Nevertheless, in a position like mine, where your main goal is to inspire, how can you reach people with so many distractions in the stands?
I had an awesome conversation yesterday with a friend, who understands the struggles I face with constantly being put into a box. Her solution, was “Say… F*ck ‘Em!”
OMG! You can’t say that. As much as you talk about God and how blessed you are, that’s not very holy of you.
See the answer is this. We hinder ourselves, from feeling the way we want, doing what comes natural, and being completely honest about who we are, so that we can make other people feel comfortable. We all have goals and aspirations, but we don’t want these precious things thwarted because of a need to feel liberated. Can I be myself and still attain my dreams and goals? I’m no Beyonce, so the risk I take won’t be such a big deal to some folks, but on the other hand I love and desire change and stepping away from the norm. I don’t feel like I should have to pretend to be someone I’m not until I make it, I want to make it while I’m holding on to who I truly am and be proud of that.
I’ve lost friendships for being too real and transparent. I’ve gotten in my share of disputes, fights, and arguments for stating unpopular opinions and stepping so outside the box, I was on an island by myself. I still remember a very bad rap song written negatively about me because I chose to be different and celebrate my gap tooth smile. My name, my brand, and my focus is all about inspiring those that understand what it means to have flaws, to have experienced things that would have broken an average person and survived, and who just want to relish in their uniqueness while throwing a middle finger to everyone that has a problem with it. Watching Beyonce’ cut her hair, was like a light bulb going off for me. Yes, finally. Yes, cut that ish off and beat your face, you are marvelous. Short hair, don’t care, lol. I was living vicariously through her fearless declaration, and I wanted to feel that freedom for myself.
My overall answer to everyone, who can now refer back to this post whenever they find it necessary to judge me, stereotype me, or to assume anything…
Don’t box me in!
- Beyonce debuts short hair on Instagram (newsday.com)
- Hip-Hop Rumors: Why Did Beyonce Cut Her Hair? (allhiphop.com)
- Pros and Cons of Short and Long Hair (eveningmister.wordpress.com)
- Wearing Wig Is Turning Into A Fashion Trend (cheapwomenwigs.wordpress.com)
- The Conspiracy That Is Motherhood (arealmummydiary.com)
- Marie Claire Covergirl Nicki Minaj Talks “Secret Boo”, Natural Hair, Retiring From Rap, And Motherhood! (bossip.com)
- Blue Ivy & Beyonce’ . The beauty Of Motherhood. (sparklebabyshineatl.com)
- 2013 Fall / Winter 2014 Black and African American Hair Trends (thestylenewsnetwork.com)
- 50 Beauty Rules to Break (beautyhigh.com)
- What to Wear Now: Metrostyle Fall 2013 Trend Report (prweb.com)